FUTURE!

AHAHAHAHAHA.

I am officially going crazy thinking about my future!!

Is it Music, Architecture, Creative Writing, Journalism OR Law?

I CAN'T BLOODY DECIDE.

But if I can have a confident one, it's MUSIC. Definitely.

BUT. Daddy will KILL me for it.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

My goodness, it's my last year in High School and this is what's happening to me. Instead of being worried about the main thing - Final Year Exam - I worry more on my future. Isn't it the good grades that determine what I really should be doing? Funny right? I just so desperately want to do Music. I want to have my whole life in just that. That's my dream since I began the small steps of Music in Grade School. I tend to make a dream of my own, a movie in fact, in my head when I hear all sorts of music, or play music. It's amazingly paradoxical! I just have no idea how to fulfill it. Mum told me I have too many ambition but actually I have too many just because she stops me from reaching one that means a lot to me.

If I have all the money in the world, I would be doing all I want. And I mean doing good things sweet peeps. HAHA. I wanna spread the importance of music to all. Without it, how can you be creative? It's like any subject in school, you need creativity to work it all out. Music is like creativity. Any sound, is music at some point. Have you thought about it, if you combine all kinds of sound you can actually make music?? It doesn't have to be nice in the beginning. Like starting from the sound of...uhm..lets say..your fart? LMAO!! I know that sounds crazy but just do it for humour sake, combine all sounds of fart, and beats of drum probably could be formed! xD

Ok ok, enough with the farting then. I could give my old man a heart attack if he reads this. He'll be thinking "What have gone into my daughter?!" HAH! This is what happens to me when I can't catch my rainbows daddy. ^^

But for now, what I plan to do is just take my chances. I won't waste it. If I have to leave my future hanging between music, architecture, creative writing, journalism and law, then I'll leave it that way. I'll apply for the many scholarship in the world and see my options and depend on my instincts and parents nags. That sounds like a pain dontcha think? I should be ready by now. It's almosy half the year and here I am, a girl without the right decision. It's kinda embarrassing to express myself this way to my parents and even the counsellor! When I see her, I go speechless. I run out of things to ask and say. And these words I'm saying right now don't come to me at all. Only when I leave the room then they flood my head back. But that'll be too late to walk back into her office. That'll be a crime in my book. HAHAHAHAHAHA.

Let's see:-

MUSIC

When I gradute, and while waiting for my results, i'd probably work with any schools to teach music class such as choir, vocals or showchoir? That's if they accept a student who wants to teach without much of a diploma and degree. LOL. But if my own High School would let me do that i'd be FREAKED! It'll be an awesome experience as I wait for my results. Or i'd probably go Form 6 and hijack the choir there and make another great 2 years for myself. HAHAHA. Of course that'll ONLY happen if the teacher allows me to do that. But honestly, it'll be awesome to do that in Form 6 because there BOYS. Voicing in choir with boys are magnific! They could reach the low note and the girls could shoot the stars! xD Imagine it, them singing "Proud Mary" Glee version, with a little twist of my ideas would be AMAZING. MORE that AMAZING maybe! TEEHEE!! Oh gawsh..i'm getting all excited. Goodness, I may have to start screaming on mountain tops now to get my psychedself off. The after Form 6, I wanna be accepted in Music Schools. One of them would be Juilliard. xDDD Kinda impossible now for a girl like me but i'd still have IMH to crash and study music. Or better, IVY LEAGUES!! Again, IF that's possible for a girl like me. HAH. Then i'll be so good in my studies. I'd ace ALL OF IT! And one day sweet peeps, you could probably listen to my music. You could be watching my Orchestra performance. Or I could be conducting or playing in the performance!! xDDD Ahh..and my next plan after that is to spread music all over. To the poor countries. If i'm rich at that moment of my life, I would go discover talents and bring them to the world. Isn't that just freakishly awesome and magnificent????? HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE.

ARCHITECTURE

Ngee~

I don't got much on this. Just one dream I tend to wonder off with when I look at nice buildings and models. I wanna go to Yale University to take this course if possible. Hehehehehe. I don't know why I want to go there. It's just the feeling when I think Architecture, I think Yale! So that's the place i'd like to go to. And when I finish studying, I would build my very own mansion on my granny's land back on the village. Then the family could all live together. THEN, I would built a resort there. Well, a resort without a beach that is, unless we could have a man-made beach. HAH. And we'd have a pool there. A HUGE ONE. ^^ Then the whole thing would be a family business that started! Weeeeee~ And i'd work harder than usual. Make my name known all around as an architect. I'd fly to Rome to see the beautiful structure of buildings. I'd go to Dublin to see more there as well. HEHEHE. Lucky me I have a brain of an I-don't-know-what. I see something, my mind expands more on it. It's like autopilot! I wanna call it crazy but it could be my "gift" that I don't really take seriously. xP If there's even such a thing. And finally, i'd fulfill my promise to a friend; Phoebe Simon. I promise that i'd build her fantasy Home. She wants it mostly to be glass like. How that's possible i'd only know after i'm a professional. Maybe i'm already supposed to know it at this age? But I may be a silly one to not know.

CREATIVE WRITING

AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

I've written so many stories! IN MY HEAD. So far, i've only had 3 on paper? It's not complete though. I wanna publish novels one day. I have one that's a series. It's my favourite among all that I've come up with. That story has been in my head since I was in Grade 3. It was inly my imagination at first. Then I dreamed of it! Then I start continuing every chapter that comes up n my head. And one day, I just figured why not to write it all down and perfect all the grammar mistake later. I am currently on Chapter 15 if i'm not mistaken. TEEHEE! I love writing down and making up stories that doesn't make sense. Then, i'd make it the craziest, the silliest, the most interesting my brain could discover! xD Just....now..I don't know what I'm gonna do with it once I'm finished. I don't know whether I should send it in for pulishing. If I even choose to send it in, I wouldn't know how. LOL. Crazy eh?

JOURNALISM

Dude..I only write this career down for the sake of having an option. I don't know what comes out of this. HAH. HHHHEEEELLPPP MEEEE.

LAW

Same goes for this one. I have this option just because I have a 25% scholarship already. I THINK. I love talking, going against something, I love annoying people that way. But that doesn't mean I wanna be doing Law right? Yeah, it pays good, YADAYADA. Money isn't the shits for me. I'm more of a passion kinda person. I wanna do something I won't hate in the end. And Law doesn't sound like one I wouldn't hate one day.

See sweeties out there. You better not be like this. There isn't gonna be anything to think about if you're in my position. GAH. xDDD

TOODLESS!! Mum's nagging me to do the laundry now. GOTTA GO! Mmmwwwaaahhx!

one minute im mad but the other im suddenly worried to death

Agh. It's mother problemo at the moment. Just a few days back and the rest of the other day we were arguing ALOT. About my studies, about my chores, about my disobedience all the way to my future. I swore I hated her to the most there and I would leave the family as soon as I graduate High School but when I saw her look when she's sick, it seems impossible to think that. the feeling dragged me back to where I should be a girl, the eldest in the house and taking my responsible properly. Heck, I even touched my brother's forehead for his temperature just in case he has fever. [I rarely do that!] Things are a little shaky at the moment. Haven't been to school two days this week now. First, I wanna study for next week's exam, second, I gotta take care of mum [by which if I get sick next and miss Semester Exam, I will musder someone!] and well...i gotta figure out some shits for Choir performace. I really am going crazy thinking about all the possible songs..they're lame that's for sure. ~~"

Well..I gotta go handle my mother now. And the chores..then my studies...*sigh*

Toodles!

@.@

..and she talks to air

Just got home from school. ==" Such a tiring day today. Didn't even study! First thing in the morning was MUSIC ROOM; practice for choir "Amalan 5S". We performed the song during assembly for the launching of some month this month. Oh gawsh, I don't know, I can't keep up with these kind of things. After that, we practiced some more, this time it was the competition song. There was improvement I must say. The sopranos are still sharp and the altos still tend to get lost but overall it was fantastic. Hahahahha!! I can still imagine my friends face when she hear all the sharp notes. Goodness, it was as if a wine glass could be broken by then. xDD

Then assembly was over so we went back to class. I had Math and it was Screamo's lesson. Urgh..thank God she wasn't being annoying to me today. She didn't even bother that I didn't have my book with me and she allowed me to study my Math. Usually she would go "Janine! Where's your book?!" Imagine metal scraping metal, that's how she probably sound like. LMAO. I'm so cruel to her...

Oh well...then it was CNY's period. ENGLISH. Hey, don't give me a look now. I love English..I just don't fancy the teacher so much. She's also annoying. She complains so much!! She also don't like anyone missing her classes. Even if it involves important matters. She would tell you to postpone that matter. Hahahahahahah!! Silly eh? xD But I didn't pay attention just now. [AS ALWAYS] I remained my notion in studying my Math. I am WAY WWWAAAYYY BEHIND. I need to catch up. Oh i'm so glad they changed the date for exam to the 29th April. If it was to be on the 24th, I am probably gonna be digging my grave right now instead of blogging. Ahhh...I can attend the HSI dinner then..<3 I'm gonna love it again! xDDDDD

Yeah, partly it's about hanging out with my band..my oh so darling boys and well..SOMEONE..hahahahahhahahaha!! SHHHHHH! And being around music just makes me the person I am. I will entertain you all the way. Even when I suck. HEHEHEHE.

Anyway..back to the topic..
Oh oh! LOL. Spent the whole day in school not studying but practicing. Yeah. That's short for everything that I wrote.
*sighs*
I'm repeating my words. Oh well..OH!! Now I remember..I came back from school, and my mum was blending tapioca (I think that's the spelling), then she was so annoyed it got stuck, she started scolding the tapioca.

MUM'S ACT:
She picked up the tapioca in the blender and looked at it in an annoyed expression,
"WHY CAN'T YOU JUST STAY NEAR THE BLADE?! IT'S GONNA BLEND YOU AND I CAN GO REST ALREADY! ISH. And don't you come complain to me now.." and she puts the tapioca into the blender and continued blending. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA.

THAT'S MY MOTHER! xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Yeah, well I gotta go shower now. Life's gotta go on. I can't stay on this blog forever or else mum's gonna nag me. And also, I wanna go complete that song i'm composing. Get back to y'all soon! xD

TOODLES!!!

Softball Competition!

9, 10, 11 APRIL 2010

SMK St Teresa has hosted a Softball Competition involving numbers of schools in the first division of Sarawak. [I THINK. LOL] Yesterday in the closing ceremony, it was announced that the we (Teresians) got third! Sad but happy at the same time!!! xDD

We've spent all of our free weeks practicing so hard and now all the hard work is paid off. The sunburns, the tired muscles and our undone homeworks can be memories now. Haha! Well, after the competition, we all look like BANGLA! xDD Our clad skin so fair but our exposed skin so dark. Our faces are black, red, overall burned. Our legs are striped colours; brown and cream due the the covered skin and burned skin. After our match, we take a looked at ourselves and just laugh because of the huge difference from before the game and after the game.

It's just such an amazing experience and an also tiring one. Today, a Monday, I look like a just rose from the dead! From my neck up to my forehead i'm red in colour. Half of my arm is like fried chicken!! And my legs...my pretty and hairy legs are striped. HAHAHAHAHAHHAA. And well, muscles are aching. The worst part is my neck muscle. I can't look down! It feels broken. And I thought yesterday that my swollen arm would be the most painful part. Even the scratch on my leg from sliding on sand doesn't hurt as much as my neck. Lol.

But yeah, I can't complain. I wanted to do the sport and I loved playing in the game. =D There were tough times. Especially when we get nagged by our coach. Some of us cry on the field in the middle of a game because of our coach. She yells and calls us stupid and not even thank us a bit for trying our best to play. At last, we just slip it out of our minds and say, WE GOT THIRD! And we so much made friends with the Lakers and suddenly become enemies with the Pendings. LOL.

The best moments was on our last day, the 11th April. The team walked to Tun Jugah to have lunch. Apparently we were supposed to just eat at some stall by the road but we ended up walking all the way to town from St Thomas school. We were like villagers on our first trip out to town. We took pictures in the middle of the road for goodness sake! Honestly, I loved how we're dressed in our jerseys walking in groups and then comes a part where we sang our theme song while walking. Yeah, people were looking but so what? Not often that we get to do that.

Then there was the "Food Gallery" craze. We were the noisiest in the food court! We laughed so much, talked so loud and I almost had my Morocco Chocolate drip out of my nose for laughing at a picture. Then after lunch, we almost got shooed out by a security guard and he followed us all the way out of the mall as if we were gonna steal something. Come on, give it a break. What kind of mall would it be if we can't be noisy and we can't travel in groups?? Silly I know, but whadaya say when you live in Malaysia mall. HAHAH.

One funny incident was the running back to St Thomas school. When we left the mall, IT STARTED RAINING HEAVILY! Our jerseys, shoes, socks, pants, underwears, bras and bags all got soaked! It was so hillarious seeing us run and cross the road. Some even screamed while running just for fun. As if we never showered in rain before.

*sigh*

Crazy..but fun! xDDDD That's all that I could report for now. Need to get my rest before my neck snap off. Hahahahahahah! Urgh..and the fact that I gotta do my chores now makes me annoyed. =="

SIGNING OFF. Mwahx!

The Long Way Home...

You never know how fast things can happen. It could hurt so much when you realized you just missed it. Sometimes, you say it is just a dream and it is not real. This should not happen, but it does. You already know it was going to happen anytime soon, but you do not want to accept it. You are praying so hard for a miracle that will not happen.

My life twirled this way. It happened so fast that I wished I was the victim. It had made me travel a long way back to greet my fading memories; a memory which I call home.

I was just walking towards the lift, taking a step after another away from grandpa’s ward when my cell phone rang. It was mom. She was sobbing while telling me that grandpa had breathed his last breath.

My whole body went stiff and I could not move or talk. I stood in front of the open lift with blank mind. I did not even realize that my face was flooded by hot streaming tears until someone gripped my shoulders to hold my quivering body still. Meanwhile, inside my head, I was chanting words like “it is not true”. If it is not, then why am I crying? To answer my question, I snapped out of my weak soul and sprinted back to the ward.

And there he lay, on that uncomfortable bed looking like a man who had just fulfilled his dream. Otherwise, he looked peaceful. Unlike the man I saw before the soul left the body, weak and suffering while having so many tubes sticking through his skin. So everything mom told me on the phone was true.

And here I was, sitting in the bus heading to grandpa’s burial ceremony while sobbing as if a taser was permanently taped to me. There, I was going through every memory I had with grandpa, trying to remember each one more clearly.

The bus eventually took a right turn and the sight of the blue billboard by the traffic junction reminded me of my childhood times. I saw myself still about five years old, laughing merrily as grandpa chased to tickle me. My mouth could suddenly taste the delight of the chocolate grandpa gave after I surrendered the tickle game. After that, the feeling of his warm arms under my thighs as he carried me was so nice.

My next memory of him was when I skidded into a big drain. The pain that struck my broken wrist was horrible. Urgently, grandpa drove me to the hospital. His caring face was filled with worry and fright. I was really glad to know that he cared for me that much. But to think of it this very moment, I would not even get to see his face anymore. The wrinkles that collided with his worried expression will be gone from the human flesh.

And then there are memories of us having happy chit-chats together. We joked most of the time and he would flash his beautiful smile that will only be in my memory from now onwards.

I stared at the green forest from the bus window. Grandpa used to be a soldier. I bet he traveled this place on foot during his young time. A new memory suddenly came in place; it was when grandpa was teaching me how to handle a cleaver, a hoe, a sickle and some other gardening tools. The way he demonstrated it to me was so brave and tough.

     “Grandpa, why do I need to cut these into smaller pieces?” I remembered myself asking that silly question when we were burning bamboo sticks. And then his caring voice chirped in reply,

     “Because we want it to burn faster and easier”

More tears clouded my eyes then. It was hot as it strolled down my cheeks and I knew my face was shades of crimson.

I also remembered when we were celebrating Chinese New Year, mom was so eager to take pictures. There was one where I sat on grandpa’s lap with his arms draped across my lap. For all I remembered, we were giggling about something I did.

     “Make sure you smile always. Don’t let your temper gets to you or you’ll grow old very fast with more grey hairs than I have” he told me this quote almost every weekend when I came to visit him.

I did grow with his advice. The whole growth I had had a smile plastered on and day by day it had turned into a grin. But I could not keep temper away from me. It is naturally in my bloodline.

     “Study hard” was also his main quotation to me. Now that he had stepped into another world, who would give me those sweet important advice?

Besides all that, grandpa also loved telling stories of his pastimes. The way he splayed his arms as he felt his story about being captured by the communist was enjoyable. I miss him terribly.

Then, another flashback came to me. It was the time when I was clipping grandpa’s nails. He had his soft, fragile fingers against my palm. Would I ever feel them again? Probably in my dreams. But if I were to answer the reality, it is a no.

I was not even close to home yet. Not yet on the peek of my memories. There is still a lot more to refresh and go through down the memory lane heading to a place called my home.

I closed my eyes and saw a little picture of a young girl about five years old laughing cheerfully as she ran up the stairs without her clothes on. I recognize this image. The girl was me. Grandpa was trying to snap a picture of my naked body because I did not want to put on any clothes. It was happy times, and the happy feeling prickled in my heart as that memory faded away replacing it with another one.

The next one was grandpa crouching on the front lawn holding a shovel. He looked up at me and stretched his lips forming his most beautiful smile. This image was when I tried to spray him with pipe water. He managed to catch me and threw me up in the air. With these memories cramming pain into my chest, a big fat tear made its way out my eyes again.

     “Jane?” grandma’s voice called me in the silent bus. My eyes fluttered open and I saw her chagrin face as her hand reached for a strand of hair that glued across my forehead. “Don’t cry anymore. Grandpa will feel sad seeing you like this”

Her words of comfort seem to make me sob harder. It was difficult to control the wound in my heart.

     “Shh…he will be with God. Don’t cry. Be happy that he is no longer suffering” she added.

Grandma’s last sentence revived the memory of grandpa’s sick moments. The time when he was just laying on the bed with tears strolling down his soft wrinkly cheeks. It was also the time where he could not move at all. I remembered wiping cold sweat from his forehead. He was definitely suffering in that condition.

After that, another memory of him popped. It was the part where grandpa voiced his last word. My cousin was asking him whether he wanted a shave and he answered,

     “Yes”. That was it. His voice box blocked his voice to come out. So the whole time we were with him before he passed away, we did not hear him say any words anymore.

The bus came to a stop and it was time to get off. Ahead of the bus was the church and there was grandpa’s coffin. Many people were surrounding it. The sky looked cloudy and there was a mere sign that it was going to rain soon.

When the burial mass was done, when grandpa’s coffin was locked up for good, we headed to the grave yard. All the grandchildren were requested to carry flowers for grandpa as we led to the grave yard. This part will definitely be in my collection of memories.

And again, I got drowned by tears. I could not stand watching them roll the coffin seven feet down the earth. How could they do that to grandpa!? Like I expected, the rain began to fall.

Therefore, this is the last memory I shall have of him. His coffin covered by the brick-coloured earth and then the rain. I am hardly at the peek of my memories yet but I did felt the sensation of home as I came this far. There is a lot more to walk through to get home and this surely have been the long way home.

Her

How shall I describe your beautiful self?

Do I start from top to bottom,

Or bottom to top?

It is so hard to decide,

You are just so magical,

Soft skin, red lips,

It makes me wonder if there is more

We were both young when I first saw you,

Your gorgeous black hair;

It falls willingly above you shoulders,

It is perfectly tangle-free,

It dazzles me

Your eyes;

Your big black Arabian eyes,

They are the brightest of all the colours,

They look fantastic decorated by those thick lashes,

They have the powers to hypnotize,

Sometimes they knock me down

Is it cherry or strawberry?

This is what I taste when you kiss my lips,

I feel like a new born child,

Every time I get the chance to see you smile,

Being close to you,

Whilst feeling your silk smooth skin,

I can see tomorrow,

You changed my whole life,

You are the one I want to share my life with

My favourite part of you,

Is your voice,

Your laugh especially,

It makes me tingle all over,

How I should say it in proper manners I don’t know,

But this is for sure,

It is the soundtrack of our love

PS: I am straight aite. Don't think differently now. LOL. When I wrote this, I was supposedly being a guy...^^ I know..CRAZY. xD Like it or not, it's your choice! Toodles!

Down Memory Lane

Sitting here on my blue desktop chair, biting my bottom lip as I faced the blank page displayed in my flat computer screen. I wonder to myself of what to contribute to my old school’s magazine launch. It is impossible for me to come up for something unique yet logical. The letter that I received stated that the contribution could be in a form of poem, story and etcetera, mainly based on the experience earned. However, nothing seems to express what I feel like writing at the moment.

Not knowing what to think at this time, my mind wandered through all the memories I had that belonged in my younger times at the school. I remembered going for the many extracurricular activities in Year 4, 5 and 6. Ahh…how I loved playing football with the boys. It was one of the best times I’ve ever had in SK Catholic English.

Thinking about this, I laughed to myself alone. It was a bit amusing as I recalled the time where we, the girls and boys always tried to play football in our vacant class when it was raining or whether if it was too hot outside. We would kick the ball and sometimes the ball would almost knock down the ceiling fan! Then, everyone would run for cover in case we get into trouble for vandalizing a school property. I had many fond times with my friends whom I grew up with there and I wish I could still hang out with them now.

Tears welled up in my eyes then. It blurred the vision of my computer screen. I couldn’t believe all these memories were real. They actually happened in my life out of all the million trillion people in the world.

I was taught by the best teachers – especially my utmost loving teachers; Mr. Joe, Madam Hilda and Mr. Ramlan. Unfortunately, for every school life has its ‘Hellos’ and ‘Goodbyes’ when the time has come. I remembered crying when I had graduated from my primary school. At the time, I couldn’t bear the thought of having to leave as from a little child I’ve studied there and to leave the teachers who’ve acted as parents to me.

As my memories unfold, I thought of the punishments received in my class. Again, I laughed alone. I had recalled Mr. Ramlan’s way of canning us as punishments before.
     “Janine! Hah! Let me see your KH assignment,” he ordered. That has somehow become his pick up line in our year.
     “Uhm…” I mumbled as I pretended to rummage through my school bag, looking for what I know was not there because I purposely left it home for not being able to complete it. I was too lazy to finish any of my homework given as I had wanted to watch my favorite TV show.
     “Sorry teacher, I…I…”, I hesitated the moment I saw the cane in his firm, big hands swinging in front of me.
     “Hah! I think I know what you were you going to say…you didn’t bring blah blah. The old cliché trick again. Well, you know what to do”, he said as he moved a few feet back, rubbing his hands together with glee as if he was going to dive into a huge chicken for meal.

Knowing what he meant, I stood up and shakily extended my hands away from my sides. It was time to feel the thing we call “Ramlan’s Mighty Cane”. We all knew it hurt, that it was excruciatingly awful but it was our own fault to always put ourselves in the position we regret. Then again, in my second opinion, I think that it was also because of how we loved to see our teacher put on a fierce face especially when one of us cries out in pain after each hit. It is like his signature punishment to us all.

As for Mr. Joe and Madam Hilda, they have their own way of admonishing their naughty students. They would usually say to us;
     “You are models to your juniors. Show a good behavior because you all are big enough to know these things. You’re not little babies anymore”

Every time when they say it, it would make me feel guilty and wanting to apologize non-stop especially when they also look straight into your eyes mainly to emphasize on what they have said.

Good times never fade fast eh? Being a high school student now changes my perspective on my primary school entirely. I realized that my old school was once my home – the love and friendships I have shared there and my dedicated teachers who are aging every day; I have loved and come to appreciate so much. Many a time, I see myself as being a young student again, running around on the school field. Everything was pleasuring me when I step my foot back on the grey pavement of SK Catholic English.

Friends whom I made with were like my brothers and sisters. No matter how much we used to quarrel, we managed to stay in touch after our momentary life there in the school. Whenever we bumped into each other, we would greet each other and then tuned in our minds together on how much fun we used to have in Catholic English.

Every time when I feel pressured by living a high school life, I think of my time in my old school. It was the only thing that kept reminding me of why I was in school, my purposes and my goal for the future.

This also reminds me that I had goals when I started living the exquisite choices of SK Catholic English. My options of ambitions changed every month! My first option was to be a teacher. This was inspired to me by Madam Hilda. Her graceful way of teaching her noisy and disobedient students inspired me until I dream of wanting to teach. Every single afternoon when I was at the age of 10, I played student-teacher with my little brother. He would get really annoyed at me as he had gotten sick of it. Yet, I didn’t care.
     “Take your books out now!” I ordered Mark, my brother. I liked pretending to act like a teacher and tick home works’. It was good to feel in charge.

Eventually, I realized that being a Mat Rempit was so much better! I wanted to be a biker. I yearned to have those big sport bikes and drive like I own the road in town. Well, this only happened after I got psyched that Mr. Ramlan drives an awesome bike! Seriously, I would pass by the bike every morning since it is only parked near the school gate and I would just dream of myself in a hot black leather suit – that’s if I ever get slim – wearing the shiniest helmet ever made and be by my big bike.

Unfortunately, that particular ambition faded too. I suddenly wanted to be an architect, then a lawyer then an architect again. This is because of Mr. Joe now. See! Every teacher has their influence on me! You see, Mr. Joe’s hand writing grows bigger and bigger if your work impressed him. This signature of his made me realize that some things can just be created into a design. Every material has its curves and straightness and righteous in it. Therefore, I began to take interest in architecture and the righteous in everything to become a lawyer too.

It was a long time that I recalled the past, and then I stopped and stared back at the black page in the computer screen. My eyes weren’t leaking tears anymore. Instead, everything clicked as my face wrinkled in joy when I smiled gladly. I know what to write for the article now! I know the exact words, the exact feeling and the exact arrangements for every word. Why didn’t I think of this walk down memory lane a few days ago?

Eagerly, I typed down what was in my mind before it fades away and it’s now all in paper.

I am so proud that I used to study in SK Catholic English. Although the school provided a small roof, I managed to learn new meanings of friendship, I learned to respect each other there, I learned that everyone is the same and I learned to be a great student with high quality dedication.

When I fail, I try harder instead of breaking down and giving up. The teachers there had pushed me so far up that I’m so close to my dreams today. They expressed that there are no boundaries in achieving the best.

Phwwooaar...

I can't believe I didn't think of creating a blog for myself in the first place. Knowing that I love writing so much crap, well, I guess this would be the best place to show others too. ^^

So, peeps out there, be yourself and read my crap. Then drop your opinions and yada yada that you gotta do. =D First of all, i'm a crazy person and I write stuff that you might not understand and stuff that just comes out of the blue. This blog of mine could consist of fiction stories, song lyrics and basically my life. It could be stupid, funny, WEIRD and well..just the way I am. =)

So enjoy! God Bless..