Dear Diary

I LOST MY PHONE AND MY HARD DRIVE WHERE ALL MY DOCUMENTS ARE. Shit. Luckily I have my novel in hardcopy. Shit man. Really shit. *sigh* If I were to lose all my novel stuff, I would die coz I wrote that for almost 5 years already..

Dear God, You are great in many ways.

You know what; FUCK YOU.

What the hell is wrong with people nowadays? You think you can barge into a printing shop without sufficient infomation for the worker to understand what you wanna do with your blood fuckfolio?! GEEZ. THIS IS CALLED A PHOTOCOPY AND PRINTING SHOP. NOT A "FIX MY FUCKFOLIO BEFORE YOU PUNCH HOLE" SHOP. I PUNCH YOUR ASSHOLE THEN YOU KNOW. Geez, GO TO HELL. YOU MAKE ME SO MAD I WANNA GIVE YOU A PIECE OF MY FIST!

Urgh.

Then there's this elderly woman, who think she's all that. Woman, i've been trying to keep my anger down for you. I've been nice, respectful but you come in the shop like you own it and telling me what i'm supposed to be doing. If you want it all right, why don't you PHOTOCOPY IT YOURSELF!? Hell, you don't even know how to use a bloody penknife! FUCK YOU! GO TO THE PIT OF HELL. I'm the one who's gonna go down to the fire for saying all this crap, BUT WHATEVER, I'LL MEET YOU THERE FUCKSHITASS FACE! I'm giving you a simple cheap price, but you wanna trouble me to give you expensive price, WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU?! I should be happy that I have profit from you cheating your own price, BUT NO. I'M MAD THAT YOU WON'T BLOODY PAY JUST WHAT I GAVE YOU.

SIAO CHA BO! Urgh.

Odor of the Unliving Soul

It was time for me to go to sleep. I crawled onto bed, feeling tired and restless and basically felt nothing to worry about. The darkness swallowed me and took me strolling in Dreamland. It was all blurry to come to think about it now. The more I think about it, the more I couldn't remember what I dreamnt about. I know I had a great sleep and the night breeze came in through the open window like waterfall which made the room cool and comfortable for someone to wrap up in their blanket.

However, somewhere in the middle of the night, I awoke from an odor so bad I thought I could throw up. The smell wasn't there always so I thought I was just imagining things. Maybe it was just the smell of the pillow I was sleeping on. I closed my eyes to go back to my interupted sleep, and again the smell floated by my nostrils. My eyes flashed opened and it stared into the darkness, searching for the source of the smell. Was someone in the room? Was there a robber? I found that question idiotic since I was living in my relatives 15th floor apartment. How could anyone come through the security, or maybe climb up that 15 stories? My eyes were then wide open, unable to sleep coz I was then suddenly afraid that it might be "something". After all, I was living in some place new. This wasn't my home. This was someone else's home. I wouldn't know what might have happened here.

My heart thudded fast and heat was beginning to prick up my neck. I stopped breathing for that horrible odor was getting my gut to gurgle. I was gonna throw up. In bed. Period. After a minute passed. I breathed again. Yes, I counted as I held my breath. I was praying that all that was just again, my imagination. There's no such thing as ghost. Mum always told me the tale that when you smell something horrible out of the blue, like it wasn't supposed to be there, don't ever mention it coz it's just a lost spirit passing by. I never believed it, but I always kept to her words. I never said anything. But does that count as believe? I don't know. I hope it doesn't count. I'm a Christian and my faith is strong I would like to proclaim. So I put aside that silly thought of the possibility of a spiritt being in my room while I sleep. I threw it to the back of my mind and closed my eyes to sleep.

Naturally I breathed, forcing myself back to sleep. Then I smelled it again. I was getting scared again. I sniffed mto find where the smell was coming from, but I couldn't find it. Just when I stopped sniffing, I smelled it as if it was jusy beside me. I was so scared, too scared in fact to even grab my blanket that was rumpled below my feet. I was too scared to even move my feet to warm them. All I manage was to take my phone to check the time; it was about six something if not mistaken, and my eyes were once again scrolling the room to find anything that might scare the living hell out of my core. I could imagine that smell to be a female. She had long, thick dark hair. Her face was unable to be seen nor to be described. She was just scary and she was around that room.

I move my body, laying flat on my back. I made the sign of the cross, put my hands together and prayed the Our Father, Hail Mary and my personal prayer asking for God to protect me and the family I was living with. Guide the lost unfortunate soul some place secure and bright where she will meet with Jesus. I prayed with my eyes closed and when I was done, I continued back to sleep for another half hour before I had to get up to my alarm. I could still smell the nasty thing, but I grabbed for my pillow an covered my nose with the pillow case. Before I knew it, I woke up for work..still thinking about it in the shower and even now while blogging. I was even scared to get dressed this morning. Nonsense shit right?

Well, I supposed i'm just a pussy when it comes to facing this kind of stuff, but i'm not much of it when I write about it. The tension just needs to be shared. =)

God bless...

Darn..she's AWESOME!

Second Week Of College

By now I should have known things around. Such as the LRT station. Supposedly, my 'touch n go' card ran out of money so I ventured around to go top up. I confidently walked towards the yellow machine with numbers of buttons on it. Yeah sure, it had instruction but the funny thing was I couldn't find button number ONE. It started with a THREE. I pushed every single button. Beeped my card at the sensor yet still nothing. Finally, I resolved by asking the lady who was coming to buy a ticket.
"Excuse me Miss. How do I work this thing?" I pointed dubiously at the yellow machine that almost tempered me up. And guess what she answered me?
"Err...Miss..that machine is out of service"
"Really?" Again, I spat my words dubiously. When I turned back at the damned machine, I saw the white paper plastered on it in front of my face. The words exclaimed at me "Out Of Service". Instantly, I felt really. REALLY. Dumb. I looked at the rest of the machines...it had the same things taped on except for the one on my left. Inside my head, I was cursing and my cheeks were growing red from embaressment. It was THAT simple, but that CARELESS. =.=

Moving on to when I reached the college, I walked in, not being stopped by the guard anymore for not wearing an ID since they know my face so well already. Went into class and taadaaa...! Lecturer wasn't in. xD Well screw that. I manage to make a new friend. Who actually bothered to talk to me. In fact, she sat next to me. Hehehe...After class, we went for lunch together. Ate McD AGAIN. =.= I swear imma die OD from McD. We talked, shared some interests...judged..FIRST IMPRESSION. She though I was the LECTURER for goodness sake! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA. Really..I look THAT old?? Or is it the way I dress. Large button downs make me look like a lecturer??? Or is it my hair? ~~' I always get that..seriously! Even from my own MOM. Grrr...

Then we went back to college to watch the Music Club host a lobby performace. :D It's awesome. Teehhee!! I joined btw! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA. Then earlier on when I was looking for a toilet, I asked the guard I never saw before, and he was like...
"You come here to pee? Do you not realise that this is a college?"
"Err...I'm a student sir" I narrowed my eyes at him.

Well...that was the adventure today. It was kinda fun. But tiring. I had to stand a lot. OH OH. THERE WAS THIS CUTIE WHO LOOK SO BLARDY FAMILIAR. I dunno why he was familiar. =.= Maybe we met in a competition?? Or...*GASP* A FRIEND'S BROTHER??? Oh nooo...*cheeky smile* I do wanna know him though. Too bad I'm not THAT daring. LMAO!!

TOODLES!

Beautiful Nightmare

"Beautiful Nightmare" is a novel that I just recently came up with. To be specific, I started writing it on the 12th January 2011. I so adore how I can be crazy. I know, how narcicist of me. ;P Anyways, I don't know whether it would be a bestselling novel or not, but that's not my porblem now. I only care to write whatever that appears in the mind of a soon-to-be 18 year old girl, and I want to have fun while I make a movie in my mind. :D Here's the PROLOGUE.

Words are sometimes unable to be used to describe beauty. there are no right words to give and exclamation to such beauty and the couldn't possibly be any words to describe what my eyes are seeing.

I watched her sleep peacefully where expressions are not faked instead her face just smiles as if she met her desires in her magical dream. She's perhaps unconcious to the world but she sure is concious in that dream that I wonder whether I was in.

I thought that my satisfaction would clear the fact that I only need to get laid but it seems not. The more I think of her, the more I want to touch her again. And being inside her once made me hunger for her even more!

I stared as she lay in the dim light of the room; her full lips parted slightly, her hands one placed across her belly and the other raked the back of her hair. Her chest moved rythymically up and down as she breathed.

Why is it that I feel attached to her? The connection was there since that day I met her on the balcony. And why was she the only on who bothered? For as long as I lived after the 4th of September 1997, no one took noticed of me except her. God...she drives me crazy. I want her. I ache for her. I know I had her, but I wanted more; inside and outside.

:D There may be changes. But this was what I wrote while sitting in ATC wondering when class was going to start. LOL.

TOODLES!!

Working Experience

I never thought it would just consist of me waking up in the morning, get ready, drive to work, have breakfast, WORK ALL DAY, forget lunch, have dinner, go home, shower, sleep. It's like I didn't even do anything in my life but get wasted. LOL. I should be saying it's fun since there's no homeworks to deal with, I have unlimited time with my laptop where the internet and games are. :D

But then, I want to do something in life that I love. Here in PJ, there's nothing musical for me to do. There's no piano or the guitar, no watching MTV coz by the time I get home from work, i'd be too exhausted for TV, no singing in church like I usually would on Sundays back home. Darn. No wonder people always say that there's a catch in every doing.

However, working is fun. I know right. I say this but I conclude another. ;) The fun part is that I get to learn and do new things for a change. I meet different people day by day and with this, I learn to improve my social life. I also learn different language slowly and this may be a very helpful skill in the future. It's an awesome feeling to work. No doubt a person qould be stressed out at times, but it's life. No life no stress right? :D SO DEAL WITH IT.

I know long time workers would probably say i'm just a newbie, i'd get over the excitement soon, but I promise you that I won't. Hehehehehe. Working is like getting ready to poop. And when you're done pooping, you'll be tired but satisfied. OMG, I came up with that lame shit in less than a minute. AHAHAHAHHHAHA!!

PeaceOut.

New Year, New Shits. ;D

Xmas has passes, New Year just begun. 2011 is a year where I don't go to school but work. It's a fun thought and also a scary one because I still have no idea where my life will lead me to. But hey, at least I got work to keep me working for a while. My mind would constantly sweep me away from the misery of finding a good school and a darn course to persue in. LOL. Persue..does that word even exist?

Anyways, currently at work trying to figure out how to use machines. Hehehe! It's fun! My first work was to print out 18 sheets of architectural plan. xDDD Awesomeness, and with that RM27 comes along. BUAHAHAHAHAHA!! Gee, so money face.

OK. I'm just here to update..toodles!